Thursday, July 5, 2007

Rainbow Connection

My neighbor's bed is about nine feet from mine. The same can be said about our toilets. Four of my windows face her apartment building. I've never seen her. I don't know if she is a "her". Then how do I know? My former roommate claimed to have seen a woman in the apartment. That might not have been good enough for Henry Fonda, but that's more than enough evidence for me. She has a black cat. I have a bit more evidence to support this statement. First, she has two black cat stickers on one of her windows. Second, on most days the cat sits double-framed, peering into my kitchen window. To be fair, if my neighbor had pickled herring each day, like yours truly does, then I would stare longingly at her kitchen window, too.

I'm not interested in meeting my neighbor. I don't imagine walking by water fountains and making jokes about bidets or singing "Let's Spoon the Night Together" under a moonlit sky. But I am interested in having some kind of connection with her. Maybe one day after a thunderstorm, we both will open our bathroom windows and a rainbow will appear, one that starts in her toilet and ends in mine.

7 comments:

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Anonymous said...

I have a pickled herring phobia. I don't think I will ever get over the notion that you actually eat pickled herring.

BC said...

I eat sardines and kippers, too. I'm surprised the cat hasn't busted through the two panes of glass.

hans q. bungle said...

a) I agree, for the most part, with rodrigo
b) are you implying that you poop gold?

BC said...

I'm with you in regards to Rodrigo's post. It's fortunate that we both studied Italian at university. I didn't mean to imply that my toilet holds gold. I'm unsure about what lies in neighbor's pot.

Anonymous said...

Now I am wondering if toilets connected by a rainbow would be the same color as a normal rainbow or just a nasty mix of yellows and browns.

Also the care-bears could travel across rainbows. Perhaps you could try this? Maybe send one of the mice over first... to, you know, see if it's safe.

BC said...

My mouse can start from my end of the rainbow. Her cat can start from her end. What do you think Rodrigo?

By the way, I have an LED disco ball (I signed the Live Earth pledge) in my bathroom so all colors will appear and disappear.